Game of Thrones : The Blackwater's On Fire

 Best. Episode. Ever.

You have faith huh ? Well good luck with that.

So the episode starts at night, everyone is getting ready for battle. Meaning that Cersei is collecting a secret poison, the essence of nightshade, you know just in case she needs to kill her youngest, Tyron is having a moment with Varys, the eunuch and of course our little Joffrey just has to torture his future wife before he goes to battle. I love that character so hard core. He named his sword. He talks about it like it's a person. He's out of his mind. I love it.

But then on the top of King's Landing wall he is just a little boy. He doesn't understand what's happening because he wasn't the one to think of preparing for an attack. He has no idea what the plan is. So he panics. He is freaking out the entire time he's out there.

But not to worry because Tyrion is leading the defense. And Tyrion rocks.

That might be my favorite suspense moment in the history of GoT. I mean just picture it : it's dark, you're at sea (the least escapable place on earth) and you see this creepy little boat approaching your fleet, there's no one on it it's just slowly advancing toward you. How do those guys not pee their pants ?

Oh and wildfire leaking from the ship. It's horrible because they see it and then they see the arrow and they're like "Well, we're f#cked".

But that's not gonna stop Stannis. So they just go around the nuclear catastrophe and manage to land on the shores. The Hound is leading a sortie to repel Stannis's army but he sees a guy on fire and has a nervous breakdown.

So they all go back inside and The Hound basically says "F#ck all of you" and goes in Sansa's room to drink, I'll get to that.

Anyway Joffrey is about to have a meltdown or start crying. The King's Guard kind of abandoned him but, thank the lord, his mummy's cousin/lover comes to fetch him. I love that shot. He looks at Tyrion for like a second but there's so much shame in this look, he knows he's not doing the right thing, the brave thing but he's just too scared to do anything else. He's so depressing, he's almost loveable.

But Tyrion manages to get the troops' morale back up ! 

But Tyrion gets slashed across the face ! Boooooh ! Burn the guy that did that. I gotta say that moment was a huge wtf? Who's that guy ? He's in the King's guard but it's not like we've ever seen him talk or anything ! And what's his deal ? Seriously where the hell did that come from ? The dude looked at him and he went all murderous like "Oh you're pretty, let me fix that for you !"

I don't remember seeing this little guy before but I like him. A lot. He's 10 times braver than Joffrey will ever be, he's completely selfless and he's kind of round and cute. Like a baby pig. You know, in a good way !

And inside the castle, Cersei offered shelter to the ladies of the court. With a guy standing by to kill them, just in case. How so very thoughtful. Anyway she tried to talk them to death all night. Honestly what's with the opening up in the most creepy and depressing way possible ? Just for kicks ?

Then she punched her cousin/whore where he'd just taken an arrow and left. That led to a whole another wtf? So Sansa left too and went to her room where she found the Hound, drinking and being all "Imminent death makes me a philosopher". Then he proposes to take her back home. Like, whaaa? Sure, you wanna elope too ? They've had more and more scenes together lately and I just don't see where that's going.

And the last (but not least) scene of the episode. Cersei telling a cute little story about a mother and her cub destined to be king before she makes her son drink some poison. "It'll protect you" oh will it now ? I get her point, I understand why she'd want to do that, save him the pain of being a prisoner and being executed but Jesus, if you're gonna go through with that, have the presence of mind to wait until you're sure it's over, until they're at your door.

But then Tywin Lannister barges in like "Daddy's home, it's over"

I have to admit I found Cersei's reaction bewildering. It was so childish, the unconditional trust she puts in her father is really sweet. Anyway, the battle is over, the Lannisters are still standing, well most of them ... I don't think they could actually kill Tyrion but there's this little doubt that makes it seem impossible to wait another 5 days ! Only one episode left, can't wait !


Game Of Thrones : Oh, The Lannisters ...

God, this show is so frustrating I want to talk about everything that happened in the last episode ! Arya, Gendry and Piggy boy escaped, Bran and his little brother are still alive (granted I was expecting that one but still !), Theon was pushed around by his sister and obnoxious Robb got some sympathy sex for imprisoning his mommy like, okay, whatever ...

But what I care about most, as always, is the Lannisters.

 Oh Joffrey, how I have missed you, the psychotic edge you put to that smile, your constantly trying to prove you're strong and fearless when really you're not ... All of you Joffrey, I've missed all of you !

"I'll give him a red smile" uh, sure dude, whatever you say ... He's so pathetic when he tries to be ruthless but it is so fun to watch ! Honestly, even if right now he's ridiculous, I think that with fifteen more years a guy that creepy could really become a feared and respected king. But for some reason I don't think we'll ever get to see him as more than he is now.

Cersei is a bitch. We already knew she was stronger and braver than her son, mostly because she's more experienced, but we hadn't really seen this cruel side yet.

Oh Tyrion ... My hero. He's the best character of this show and Peter Dinklage is simply amazing.

So Cersei found "his" whore. Actually it was the other one. I still don't know her name, but poor girl. She never should have left Winterfell, all this crap just keeps happening to her ... Anyway Tyrion acted as if she was his lover, and Cersei had her revenge.

After threatening Cersei, Tyrion ran to his real love, Shae. It was such a sweet moment. I'm gonna sound like a girly little girl but it was so adorable. I love Tyrion, we've established that, and I love that he's funny and cynical, but there's also this extremely fragile side of him that we've only seen when he was with Shae and it is just heartbreaking. Without her he'd be completely lost. He'd probably kill hir sister if she ever harmed her.

Yes she is yours, please be happy !

Gone but never forgotten, Jaime Lannister. Boy, did I miss you !

Since he was made a prisoner by Robb the faggety fagget, we didn't see much of him. But thanks to Robb's insufferable mother he's free ! And I cannot wait to see more of him.
"Has anyone ever told you you are as boring as you are ugly ?" I mean come on ! Who says that ? Welcome back Jaime, I do hope we'll be hearing from you very soon, like tonight for example.

It took me a while to write about last week's episode because there was so much I wanted to talk about it was just so hard to choose ! I still want to talk about Snow with Ygritte's gang, and Theon's struggle for power, but I guess I'll have to save it for a rainy afternoon.


Teen Wolf : New Supernatural Show On My Radar

I've only recently started to watch Teen Wolf and I've gone through the first season quite fast since it's only 12 episodes. Anyway season 2 is starting in like a week and since lately all the shows I watch are throwing finales at my face I thought I'd talk about Teen Wolf's finale. So this is a year late but I don't care.

Basically the episode starts with his girlfriend finding out he's a werewolf. He's been trying to hide it since the beginning, he finally decided to tell her but her daddy took care of that.

I actually like Allison. She's not exactly strong but she's not weak either and she doesn't want to be. She seems naive, kinda like all young female characters on supernatural shows but not in a frustrating kind of way like "Oh my god you are so stupid, it's a wonder you even figured out how to stand on your own two feet !"

On the contrary, Scott just doesn't do it for me. He's a child. It's actually realistic, I mean I don't think a kid his age would stay cool and controlled in his situation but this is television for god's sake ! I want to believe that all teenagers are ripped like he is. I want to believe that they are strong and fearless. He's too susceptible and emotive for me.

Anyway, when they were thinking about each other at exactly the right time (yes this show is full of clichés like that) he actually managed to think about his (sorta) friend who's been held prisoner for like 3 episodes and figured out he could find out where he is by getting him to howl. Smart. But not very discrete. If he can hear it, so can the alpha (the bad guy).

Scott managed to rescue Derek but then, for some reason, Allison and her bitchy aunt were there and shooting at them. But then Allison's father arrived ready to set things right. And that involved pointing a gun at his sister (the bitch).

That was fun for a while, but what was better was when the alpha started to screw with her for killing his entire family and putting him in a coma for 6 years. 

Sadly he died. I was expecting it but not quite yet. I mean we finally found out who he was 4 episodes before the end of the season, he was the guy everyone was afraid of and now what he's just gone ? After 4 episodes ? Oh and Derek killed him. So now Derek's the bad guy. I could like Derek. I want to like Derek. But he's creepy in a ridiculous way. He's the cliché of the mysterious guy who seems bad but isn't but sometimes he's fun ! I want more of that !

 The only character I like 100% is Stiles Stilinski. He's funny ! He's the one character I'm happy to see when he walks into the room. Dylan O'Brien looks a little too much like Justin Bieber but he doesn't piss me off as much. In the end, Teen Wolf is not a thrill to watch but if you have 40 minutes to kill it's nice. It's not the new Vampire Diaries but it's a lot better than The Secret Circle. That's my new scale in terms of supernatural shows. It didn't get cancelled after the first season but it's not full of hot guys and/or thrilling moments. Like I said, if you have time to kill ..


Supernatural Finale : Guess That Means Sammy's The Fittest

Well, that's the end of season 7. I can't believe I've been watching this show for 4 years now. Season 5 should have been the last but the CW decided to keep it going a little longer. We're 2 seasons later and apparently not only is there gonna be a season 8 but also a 9th !

I have to admit I'm glad but I'm a little scared too. I mean it's been 7 years, this is a good show but like I said it was supposed to end after season 5. I was happy back then too, I didn't want it to end quite just yet. And yet season 6 was a major disappointment. Season 7 was better, Dick has been one of the best bad guys ever, but still, the way I see it Supernatural is on thin ice. From what I heard, the producer is going to be replaced by a writer who worked on the earlier seasons. I'm hoping it'll show in the story.

As many other great things, season 5 introduced Crowley. Oh, Crowley. The king of hell with a British accent and an attitude. Mark Sheppard is absolutely perfect for the part and Crowley is an extremely well-written character this show can never afford to lose.

Misha Collins is about just as important but it's mostly because his character is so central. He's like the central pillar of this thing. He just feels safe. When really he's not but he's reliable and so much power in someone so naive makes him strangely endearing.

He was gone for a while this season and recently came back. Except he's broken, meaning he's in his own world, he has little sense of reality and has become much more impressionable. And it's been great to watch.

He spends most of his time talking about cat penises, monkeys or playing twister, making sandwiches and offering honey as an apology for enslaving the king of hell. He's made me realize how big a part humor plays in the show.

Anyway, the big bad of season 7 was Dick Roman. Kind of the king of Leviathans. He was a pleasure to watch, maybe not as much as Lucifer was, but close. But he's dead now. Sigh.

Only problem is, when they killed him, Cass' and Dean were sucked into Purgatory. Worse than hell, Purgatory is where all the monsters "come to prey upon each other for all eternity", it's where Dick is from. It's where is mommy was from. And all of her other children.

After Cass' briefly explains this to Dean he vanishes and Dean is left alone in some dark woods, surrounded by the rest of Dick's family. And, end of the season. Well good luck on this one.

This leaves poor Sammy all alone in the real world. Dick's dead, they saved the world (again) but his big brother is gone, so's Cass' and Crowley took "what's-his-face" the prophet (I want to call him Glenn for some reason ...) on his way out. Survival of the fittest my ass ! Sam's not the fittest, Sam sucks. All he ever does is feel guilty, cry a little, then be soulless for a while, then feel guilty again, cry some more and talk to Satan. And that's the only one left ?

I do want to see season 8 but it's not like I can't wait a few month, I honestly think I could wait a year. Although, objectively, this was a nice finale with a good cliffhanger, I don't really care. I mean I want to know what's gonna happen but I just don't care enough to guess and imagine what it will be like. Well at least I'm pleased with the idea of yet another season, that's a start. See you in a few months Supernatural, have a nice summer.


The Vampire Diaries Finale : Tyler And Caroline

I just really want to talk about this, and then I'm done with the Vampire Diaries finale ! Mostly because there won't be anything I haven't talked about.

So Tyler and Caroline were supposed to leave town because of Alaric's take over of the council. But Caroline wouldn't leave without at least trying to help the others so they decided to meet up 2 hours later and then leave town.

Only problem is, in those two hours, Klaus died. Klaus supposedly originated everyone's bloodline but the only thing that is certain is that he turned Tyler. There's no lying about that. If Klaus dies, Tyler dies it's unavoidable.

I don't think I have ever cried this much watching the Vampire Diaries, but if I have it was because of a scene with Candice Accola. No doubt about that.

It was such a sweet and sad scene. Tyler tries to be reassuring and tells her she has a beautiful future ahead of her, that she's gonna be okay. What makes them so adorable is that in this moment they both know (/think) they're going to die, but both of them focus on the other, feel bad for the other. I've been rooting for them since the moment Tyler started asking her questions about what was going on with him after he triggered his werewolf side. And in the end they were together, facing death (possibly) together and only afraid for the other.

The Vampire Diaries loves having a character know they're gonna die and that there's not a damn thing they can do about it. It makes room for sweetly horrible moments. He knows for sure he's going to die, the only question remaining is : Is she ?

But when he's bend over and she's not it becomes clear she's gonna be okay and he's gonna die. 

So what does he do ? He makes her go away by threatening her so that she doesn't have to watch him die. Sigh.

And you'd think that's it. Enters Bonnie. She did some kind of spell or I don't know what. I know it saved everyone but it still pisses me off 'cause it's her. Why is she still here ? I seem to recall her dying at some point, why the hell is she still here ? I mean come on ! They can kill Alaric, Klaus AND Tyler but not her ? Not just her ?

So our good Michael Trevino's still standing except he's now Klaus. That way Tyler dies but the rest of them don't. Hurrah.